The harassment and threats did not stop when I left my X.
They only intensified.
My daughter and I stayed with friends while I sorted out my next steps. My X cut off all food and money, and went so far as to even cut off his own child’s diaper service. He thought that if he did this, I would come back.
He refused to go to court and threatened that if I left Hawaii and went home to be supported by my family, he would have me charged with kidnapping. He said if I called the cops, I was dead.
When I gave him visitation with my young daughter, he would bring her back to me at midnight, hours after our agreed time. He wanted me to worry. He told me I was the cause of it all. That I got what I deserved. He stalled for weeks with signing any agreements, keeping me and my child in limbo.
Once I was back home in Canada, the harassment and threats continued. He phoned me at my parent’s house and called me a cunt, a whore, a bitch, a tramp, a slut. He wanted to know who I was sharing my pussy with now.
He’d switch tactics and tell me that my dad was on his side. That he thought the baby was better off with him due to my mental health issues. That my mom told him I’d been to counselling and that she thought I had Multiple Personality Disorder. He repeatedly told me that no one cared about me. That I was an embarrassment to my family.
He told me he was going to have my mom, and my sister, and me institutionalized. He told me he was going to bankrupt my family. That we’d have nothing when he was done. That he was going to have me thrown in jail for perjury. That he was going to have me charged with fraud. He was going to fuck me up.
He’d call and tell me that he was going to come to Canada and take my daughter away. That my dad was helping him. He called and told me he was in Canada, he knew where I lived, and he was coming to get my daughter.
I had to leave my dad’s house. He was helping my X. I moved out on my own and began my life as a single-parent. My X hired a private detective who took photographs and found me. I had to get a restraining order. I had to unlist my phone number.
Now when I look back, I’m astonished that I dared to defy him. His behavior was scary and I was in trauma recovery. But I was a mama on a mission. I would protect me and my daughter at all costs. I regained my self-confidence and self-worth. I regained my personal power.
I came home to what I always was – a joy junky and lover of life.